film: Hancock

With boozy Xmas parties fast approaching, I want you to ask yourself a question. Are YOU an alcoholic? No – like, seriously, are you? I only ask because a friend of mine recently directed me to the Alcoholic’s Anonymous website which tells you whether you are or not. So, In the name of science, I’m going to give it a go.

You log onto www.aa.org and find the test. So here we go.

1. Have you ever decided to stop drinking for a week or so, but only lasted for a couple of days? Well come on. We’ve all done that. It’s Lent, it’s your best mate’s birthday. Booze o’clock. Y
2. Do you wish people would mind their own business about your drinking– stop telling you what to do? Well every time I order a Guinness with my girlfriend she worries about the farting. But I like the taste of Guinness so….Guilty. Y
3. Have you ever switched from one kind of drink to another in the hope that this would keep you from getting drunk? Don’t be silly. Don’t you switch from one drink to another in the hope that you will get you drunk? N
4. Have you had to have an eye-opener upon awakening during the past year? I’m assuming eye-opener means drink here. Erm…technically I had a bloody mary for breakfast two months ago, but does that count? Oh god. Y
5. Do you envy people who can drink without getting into trouble? This is a dumb question. Of course I do. Imagine being able to drink without liver damage or the fear of making an idiot of yourself. Y.
6. Have you had problems connected with drinking during the past year? Is eating rancid kebabs at 1 in the morning a problem? Hmmm…..this isn’t going well. Y
7. Has your drinking caused trouble at home? I have NEVER had a drunken argument with my girlfriend. EVER. Click Y
8. Do you ever try to get “extra” drinks at a party because you do not get enough? Listen, if the bar is heavingly busy, then it’s madness not to buy two beers. Y
9. Do you tell yourself you can stop drinking any time you want to, even though you keep getting drunk when you don’t mean to? Help. Y
10. Have you missed days of work or school because of drinking? Never. Ever. Y
11. Do you have “blackouts”? Is this memory loss? Well do you remember everything. What kind of human computer are you. Y
12. Have you ever felt that your life would be better if you did not drink? I don’t think so. N

So….let’s get the results. Did you answer YES four or more times? If so, you are probably in trouble with alcohol. Oh balls. Well, all of this self-denial and alcoholic excess brings me with an unsteady hop, leap and a jump to Hancock.

So what’s the plot? Well Will Smith is Hancock, a self-loathing drunk who also happens to possess superhero powers. This is Smith’s first time giving the superhero genre a go, and he does it as the anti-superhero. He can pretty much put his hand to anything from comedy to action to Rom-Com. Well, Hancock has done a great job of alienating nearly everyone in Los Angeles by causing untold amounts of damage to public property. However, redemption is on the cards in the form of warm hearted PR man Ray who offers to rebrand him.

Given the overabundance of superhero movies, the makers of Hancock clearly thought it was time to take a different angle on the genre. The movie starts out with obvious intent to make a comedy, and, for the most part, it delivers. Smith plays the grouchy protaganist to a tee, and the set up succeeds in exploring areas that standard comedys simply can’t. This notably includes Hancock swewering get-away cars on public monuments and effortlessly throwing a beached whale half a mile back into the ocean.

But much like your neighbourhood wino, Hancock the movie soon stumbles into unpredictable territory. During the second half of the film, Hancock finds out who he really is, and gets intertwined in a dark sub-plot with Jason Batmen’s PR man Ray and his wife, played by Charlize Theron. The combined effect is a considerably darker, more menacing film that really bares no relation at all to its first half. It’s change in tone is so unbelievable that you could actually be watching a different movie.

Does the effect work? Well no, I’m afraid not. Had the writers stuck to the comedy, the film would have been a nice diversion from your standard worthy superhero fare. Had they started dark and stayed dark, then that too would have produced a film of note. As it is, this is a confused, uneven movie that is as forgettable as a big night on the razzle. 3 stars.

For the best of the rest:

Timeout:
Will Smith stars in this action comedy as a Superman-like hero who, due to a series of high-profile blunders, has fallen out of favour with the public (and not, alas, a biopic of one of Britain’s best loved comedy curmudgeons). Add to all of this the storming rows he has with his wife Charlize Theron and an awkward relationship with wisecracking PR guy, Jason Bateman.

Channel 4:
“Oliver Reed from Krypton” is a pretty slim premise to build a whole movie around but when producers secured Will Smith - and thus a big enough budget to show a city being trashed by the super-powered stumble-bum - one can imagine script quality stopped being much of a concern.

Little White Lies:
Will Smith is a fascinating character. He pretty much heads the list of Hollywood’s A-list megastars; bagging 20 million a movie, ranging across genres from comedy to action to rom-com (and winning big every time), while steering clear of bloated franchises (he’s done sequels, but ‘threequels’? Not yet, at least).